Heaven is where the police are British  

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Train wreck at Montparnasse (October 22, 1895) by Studio Lévy and Sons.
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Train wreck at Montparnasse (October 22, 1895) by Studio Lévy and Sons.

"Heaven is where the police are British" is the incipit of a joke on national character of the British, French, German, Italian and Swiss people.

According to some[1], the joke was conceived by Ahmet Ertegun, founder of Atlantic Records, first attested in a 1982 Google Books record[2] and another record of 1983[3]:

What’s heaven? Heaven is where the police are British, the chefs are French, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian and the organizers are Swiss.
So then, what’s hell? Hell is where the police are German, the chefs are British, the mechanics are French, the lovers are Swiss and the organizers are Italian.

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Unless indicated otherwise, the text in this article is either based on Wikipedia article "Heaven is where the police are British" or another language Wikipedia page thereof used under the terms of the GNU Free Documentation License; or on original research by Jahsonic and friends. See Art and Popular Culture's copyright notice.

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